Cut The Electronic Cord

Remember back to a day not all that long ago—OK, maybe my first sleepover was 35 years ago—during your childhood when you had your first sleepover? 

That meant staying for probably 12-14 hours at a friend’s home with no communication home to your parents or siblings. This also meant you were prepared to function in another home where things were different. 

Maybe you had to eat different food, deal with another style of parenting, play by someone else’s house rules and not say goodnight to your own family. Perhaps you had to leave a favorite blanket behind ... all of that said, you were so ready for independence and spending all night with your best friend you were willing to live without anything at home that may have made you feel secure. It was a big leap but so exciting.

Fast-forward to today’s first sleepover. My 9-year old daughter loves a good sleepover and is willing to leave anything behind at home to gain that independence if only for 24 hours. 

Of course, my daughter doesn’t own an iPhone, iPad or Kindle. I recently found myself nearly enraged when my daughter had a friend sleep over who brought her iPhone and Kindle to the sleepover with her.

I have now deemed these items the electronic umbilical cord(s). Over dinner, when we asked why such items were necessary for a one-night sleepover, we heard “my dad likes to say goodnight to me.” Hmmm … OK, does your dad call you on the phone to say goodnight when you are home? I must say, for a moment I was a little “OK” with the phone … that was until later that evening when I saw these two girls huddled over the phone while my daughter watched her friend play a video game … ugh … back to rage.

Later that evening after ranting to my significant other over a glass of wine, what I realized was that it’s again the over-protective, helicopter parenting style of the new millennium that is robbing children of valuable social experiences and interactions. 

As parents, we should be willing to give up one night of “goodnight” to allow our children to develop independence and social skills that will serve them as they grow and develop. 

While I realize we live in the age of technology and our children are leaps and bounds ahead in ability and use of electronics from my generation, this is one mom who still believes it’s imperative “kids be kids” without electronics; somebody please tell me there is still value in running, jumping, laughing, talking and maybe, just maybe, even disagreeing.